Brazilian journalist asks to stop believing that women who do not have children “are incomplete”

On October 12, the Children’s Day was celebrated in Brazil, a moment that various mothers take the opportunity to pamper their little ones with gifts, sweets or parties to show the love they have for them.

However, not all women join in this celebration, as they have decided not to have children, such is the case of journalist Ana Paula Padrão, who took advantage of the holiday to remind society that not being a mother does not make her a woman incomplete as many of your colleagues and family have told you. His comment generated controversy on social networks, but at the same time, it helped to break down a taboo that society has carried for years.

Ana Paula, 55, used her Instagram account to express how proud and complete she feels not having children. At the same time, she spoke about her experience in motherhood, because for years she tried to get pregnant, going through various treatments and experiencing a miscarriage, a situation that led her to reassess whether she really wanted to be a mother or was only forced to comply with a social role, since on several occasions it was mentioned that women without children are incomplete women.

Today is Children’s Day and there are no children in the house. I had no children. And believe me, life without children is not an empty life. I even thought about getting pregnant a while ago when age sounded the alert now or never! However, some unsuccessful attempts made me realize that I was inventing a frustration that did not exist before.

I was not a teenager who always dreamed of a house full of children. In early adulthood I didn’t think much of that either. They said: an hour comes desire! It did not arrive. However, the context of a stable relationship and the deadline set by nature made me give it a try. When I gave up on the story, it was even with a sense of relief.

The treatments are intense, cause very severe hormonal variations and I still went through the deep pain of losing a pregnancy in the 10th week. Besides this physical problem, the most important thing is that my head was not convinced: Do I really want to be a mother or am I being pushed to fulfill the social role that is expected of a woman? Today I think that perhaps my body understood this conflict before my conscience. I have a perfectly happy life without children. I’m not saying that women don’t have children if they want to. I am here proving that not being a mother does not make me an incomplete woman or a sad person.

I don’t talk much about this topic because they rarely ask me about it, but I know that there are still many women who live the same doubts that I had and it is to them that I turn.

Ana Paula also clarified that her comment does not promote women not having children or criticize those who want them. Just show your point of view and see that women who have decided not to have children owe nothing to anyone and can have a full life.

I was the mother of countless projects, I helped to be the mother of many people and I never looked back with regret. So whatever your choice is, let it be yours! – and never let yourself be judged by the paths you decided to take, even if they defy common sense.

To close her comment and experience, the journalist invited other women to make their own decisions, away from social pressure and the role that for years they have been led to believe they must fulfill.

On the other hand, Internet users were quick to criticize his comment as something out of place because it was done in the middle of the Children’s Day celebration. While many others supported and appreciated that he had shared his experience, as it motivated them to follow their own ideals.